The 28 "Rules of Ranging" are a series of rules and guidelines created by Major Robert Rogers in 1757, during the French and Indian War (1754–63).
The rules were originally written at Rogers Island in the Hudson River near Fort Edward. They were intended to serve as a manual on guerrilla warfare for Rogers' Ranger company, a 600 strong contingent whose members were personally selected by Rogers.
The rules were the result of Rogers' blend of Native American tactics and his own innovative combat techniques, ideas that were considered revolutionary by military standards of the time. Combined with intensive training and live fire exercises, these rules created a mobile, well trained force that was capable of living off the land around it in order to sustain itself for long periods of time.
Ranger commander Lt. Colonel William Darby read the rules to the 1st Ranger Battalion prior to action during World War II, and a modified version of the rules is followed by the 75th Ranger Regiment to this day, and they are considered as the model for all Ranger activities. They also form the basis of the "Standing Orders" taught to U.S. Army Rangers today.
The Fighting Eleventh also uses a modified version known as the "29 Rules of Ranging".
1). All servicemembers are to be subject to the rules and articles of war; to appear at roll-call every evening, on their own parade, equipped, each with a rifle, 60 rounds, a knife and hatchet, at which time an officer from each company is to inspect the same, to see they are in order, so as to be ready on any emergency to march at a minute's warning; and before they are dismissed, the necessary guards are to be draughted, and scouts for the next day appointed.
(In short; All servicemembers, regardless of nation, are subject to the rules of war.)
2). Whenever you are ordered out to the enemies forts or frontiers for discoveries, if your number be small, march in a single file, keeping at such a distance from each other as to prevent one shot from killing two men, sending one man, or more, forward, and the like on each side, at the distance of twenty yards from the main body, if the ground you march over will admit of it, to give the signal to the officer of the approach of an enemy, and of their number.
(In short; In a small group, march in single file with enough space between so that one shot can't pass through one man and kill a second.)
3). If you march over marshes or soft ground, change your position, and march abreast of each other to prevent the enemy from tracking you (as they would do if you marched in a single file) till you get over such ground, and then resume your former order, and march till it is quite dark before you encamp, which do, if possible, on a piece of ground which that may afford your sentries the advantage of seeing or hearing the enemy some considerable distance, keeping one half of your whole party awake alternately through the night.
(In short; Marching over soft ground should be done abreast, making tracking difficult.)
4). Some time before you come to the place you would reconnoitre, make a stand, and send one or two men in whom you can confide, to look out the best ground for making your observations.
(In short; Before reaching your destination, send one or two men forward to scout the area and avoid traps.)
5). If you have the good fortune to take any prisoners, keep them separate, till they are examined, and in your return take a different route from that in which you went out, that you may the better discover any party in your rear, and have an opportunity, if their strength be superior to yours, to alter your course, or disperse, as circumstances may require.
(In short; If prisoners are taken, keep them separate and question them individually.)
6). If you march in a large body, with a design to attack the enemy, divide your party into three columns, each headed by a proper leader, and let those columns march in single files, the columns to the right and left keeping at twenty meters distance or more from that of the center, if the ground will admit, and let proper guards be kept in the front and rear, and suitable flanking parties at a due distance as before directed, with orders to halt on all eminences, to take a view of the surrounding ground, to prevent your being ambuscaded, and to notify the approach or retreat of the enemy, that proper dispositions may be made for attacking, defending, and if the enemy approach in your front on level ground, form a front of your three columns or main body with the advanced guard, keeping out your flanking parties, as if you were marching under the command of trusty officers, to prevent the enemy from pressing hard on either of your wings, or surrounding you, which is the usual method of savages, if their number will admit of it, and be careful likewise to support and strengthen your rear-guard.
(In short; Marching in groups of three or four hundred should be done in three separate columns, within support distance, with a point and rear guard.)
7). If you are obliged to receive the enemy's fire, fall, or squat down, till it is over; then rise and discharge at them. If their main body is equal to yours, extend yourselves occasionally; but if superior, be careful to support and strengthen your flanking parties, to make them equal to theirs, that if possible you may repulse them to their main body, in which case push upon them with the greatest resolution with equal force in each flank and in the center, observing to keep at a due distance from each other, and advance from tree to tree, with one half of the party before the other ten or twelve meters. If the enemy push upon you, let your front fire and fall down, and then let your rear advance through them and do the like, by which time those who before were in front will be ready to discharge again, and repeat the same alternately, as occasion shall require; by this means you will keep up such a constant fire, that the enemy will not be able easily to break your order, or gain your ground.
(In short; When attacked, fall or squat down to receive fire and rise to deliver. Keep your flanks as strong as the enemy's flanking force, and if retreat is necessary, maintain the retreat fire drill.)
8). If you oblige the enemy to retreat, be careful, in your pursuit of them, to keep out your flanking parties, and prevent them from gaining eminences, or rising grounds, in which case they would perhaps be able to rally and repulse you in their turn.
(In short; When chasing an enemy, keep your flanks strong, and prevent them from gaining high ground where they could turn and fight.)
9). If you are obliged to retreat, let the front of your whole party fire and fall back, till the rear hath done the same, making for the best ground you can; by this means you will oblige the enemy to pursue you, if they do it at all, in the face of a constant fire.
(In short; When retreating, the rank facing the enemy must fire and retreat through the second rank, thus causing the enemy to advance into constant fire.)
10). If the enemy is so superior that you are in danger of being surrounded by them, let the whole body disperse, and every one take a different road to the place of rendezvous appointed for that evening, which must every morning be altered and fixed for the evening ensuing, in order to bring the whole party, or as many of them as possible, together, after any separation that may happen in the day; but if you should happen to be actually surrounded, form yourselves into a square, or if in the woods, a circle is best, and, if possible, make a stand till the darkness of the night favours your escape.
(In short; If the enemy is far superior, the whole squad must disperse and meet again at a designated location. This scatters the pursuit and allows for organized resistance.)
11). If your rear is attacked, the main body and flankers must face about to the right or left, as occasion shall require, and form themselves to oppose the enemy, as before directed; and the same method must be observed, if attacked in either of your flanks, by which means you will always make a rear of one of your flank-guards.
(In short; If attacked from the rear, the ranks reverse order, so the rear rank now becomes the front. If attacked from the flank, the opposite flank now serves as the rear rank.)
12). If you determine to rally after a retreat, in order to make a fresh stand against the enemy, by all means endeavour to do it on the most rising ground you come at, which will give you greatly the advantage in point of situation, and enable you to repulse superior numbers.
(In short; If a rally is used after a retreat, make it on the high ground to slow the enemy advance.)
13). In general, when pushed upon by the enemy, reserve your fire till they approach very near, which will then put them into the greatest surprise and consternation, and give you an opportunity of rushing upon them with your hatchets and cutlasses to the better advantage.
(In short; When lying in ambuscade, wait for the enemy to get close enough that your fire will be doubly frightening, and after firing, the enemy can be rushed with hatchets.)
14). When you encamp at night, fix your sentries in such a manner as not to be relieved from the main body till morning, profound secrecy and silence being often of the last importance in these cases. Each sentry therefore should consist of six men, two of whom must be constantly alert, and when relieved by their fellows, it should be done without noise; and in case those on duty see or hear any thing, which alarms them, they are not to speak, but one of them is silently to retreat, and acquaint the commanding officer thereof, that proper dispositions may be made; and all occasional sentries should be fixed in like manner.
(In short; At a campsite, the sentries should be posted at a distance to protect the camp without revealing its location. Each sentry will consist of 6 men with two constantly awake at a time.)
15). At the first dawn of day, awake your whole detachment; that being the time when the savages choose to fall upon their enemies, you should by all means be in readiness to receive them.
(In short; The entire detachment should be awake before dawn each morning as this is the usual time of enemy attack.)
16). If the enemy should be discovered by your detachments in the morning, and their numbers are superior to yours, and a victory doubtful, you should not attack them till the evening, as then they will not know your numbers, and if you are repulsed, your retreat will be favoured by the darkness of the night.
(In short; Upon discovering a superior enemy in the morning, you should wait until dark to attack, thus hiding your lack of numbers and using the night to aid your retreat.)
17). Before you leave your encampment, send out small parties to scout round it, to see if there be any appearance or track of an enemy that might have been near you during the night.
(In short; Before leaving a camp, send out small parties to see if you have been observed during the night.)
18). When you stop for refreshment, choose some spring or rivulet if you can, and dispose your party so as not to be surprised, posting proper guards and sentries at a due distance, and let a small party waylay the path you came in, lest the enemy should be pursuing.
(In short; When stopping for water, place proper guards around the spot making sure the pathway you used is covered to avoid surprise from a following party.)
19). If, in your return, you have to cross rivers, avoid the usual fords as much as possible, lest the enemy should have discovered, and be there expecting you.
(In short; Avoid using regular river fords as these are often watched by the enemy.)
20). If you have to pass by lakes, keep at some distance from the edge of the water, lest, in case of an ambuscade or an attack from the enemy, when in that situation, your retreat should be cut off.
(In short; Avoid passing lakes too close to the edge, as the enemy could trap you against the water's edge.)
21). If the enemy pursue your rear, take a circle till you come to your own tracks, and there form an ambush to receive them, and give them the first fire.
(In short; If an enemy is following your rear, circle back and attack him along the same path.)
22). When you return from a scout, and come near our forts, avoid the usual roads, and avenues thereto, lest the enemy should have headed you, and lay in ambush to receive you, when almost exhausted with fatigues.
(In short; When returning from a scout, use a different path as the enemy may have seen you leave and will wait for your return to attack when you're tired.)
23). When you pursue any party that has been near our forts or encampments, follow not directly in their tracks, lest they should be discovered by their rear guards, who, at such a time, would be most alert; but endeavour, by a different route, to head and meet them in some narrow pass, or lay in ambush to receive them when and where they least expect it.
(In short; When following an enemy force, try not to use their path, but rather plan to cut them off and ambush them at a narrow place or when they least expect it.)
24). If you are to embark in watercraft, or otherwise, by water, choose the evening for the time of your embarkation, as you will then have the whole night before you, to pass undiscovered by any parties of the enemy, on hills, or other places, which command a prospect of the lake or river you are upon.
(In short; When traveling by water, leave at night to avoid detection.)
25). In paddling or rowing, give orders that the boat or canoe next the sternmost, wait for her, and the third for the second, and the fourth for the third, and so on, to prevent separation, and that you may be ready to assist each other on any emergency.
(In short; In rowing in a chain of boats, the one in front should keep contact with the one directly astern of it. This way they can help each other and the boats will not become lost in the night.)
26). Appoint one man in each boat to look out for fires, on the adjacent shores, from the numbers and size of which you may form some judgment of the number that kindled them, and whether you are able to attack them or not.
(In short; One man in each boat will be assigned to watch the shore for fires or movement.)
27). If you find the enemy encamped near the banks of a river or lake, which you imagine they will attempt to cross for their security upon being attacked, leave a detachment of your party on the opposite shore to receive them, while, with the remainder, you surprise them, having them between you and the lake or river.
(In short; If you are preparing an ambuscade near a river or lake, leave a force on the opposite side of the water so the enemy's flight will lead them into your detachment.)
28). If you cannot satisfy yourself as to the enemy's number and strength, from their fire, conceal your boats at some distance, and ascertain their number by a reconnoitering party, when they embark, or march, in the morning, marking the course they steer, when you may pursue, ambush, and attack them, or let them pass, as prudence shall direct you. In general, however, that you may not be discovered by the enemy upon the lakes and rivers at a great distance, it is safest to lay by, with your boats and party concealed all day, without noise or shew; and to pursue your intended route by night; and whether you go by land or water, give out parole and countersigns, in order to know one another in the dark, and likewise appoint a station every man to repair to, in case of any accident that may separate you.
(In short; When locating an enemy party of undetermined strength, send out a small scouting party to watch them. It may take all day to decide on your attack or withdrawal, so signs and countersigns should be established to determine your friends in the dark.)
29). If you are attacked in rough or flat ground, it is best to scatter as if in rout. At a pre-picked place you can turn, allowing the enemy to close. Fire closely, then counterattack with weapons. Flankers could then attack the enemy and rout him in return.
(In short; fake a retreat and reel the enemy close before engaging)
Standing Orders
The following Standing Orders, which are distinct from the 28 Rules listed above, are a work of fiction: they are from Kenneth Roberts' 1937 novel about Rogers, Northwest Passage. Quaint and folksy, these orders have nonetheless been adopted by the modern U. S. Army Rangers and are placed just after the Ranger Creed in every edition of the Ranger Handbook. These are also in use by the Fighting Eleventh.
1. Don't forget nothing.
2. Have your rifle clean as a whistle, knife scoured, six magazines minimum, and be ready to march at a minute's warning.
3. When you're on the march, act the way you would if you was sneaking up on a deer. See the enemy first.
4. Tell the truth about what you see and what you do. There is an army depending on us for correct information. You can lie all you please when you tell other folks about the Fighting Eleventh, but don't never lie to a another Marine or officer.
5. Don't never take a chance you don't have to.
6. When we're on the march we march single file, far enough apart so one shot can't go through two men.
7. If we strike swamps, or soft ground, we spread out abreast, so it's hard to track us.
8. When we march, we keep moving till dark, so as to give the enemy the least possible chance at us.
9. When we camp, half the party stays awake while the other half sleeps.
10. If we take prisoners, we keep 'em separate till we have had time to examine them, so they can't cook up a story between 'em.
11. Don't ever march home the same way. Take a different route so you won't be ambushed.
12. No matter whether we travel in big parties or little ones, each party has to keep a scout 20 yards ahead, 20 yards on each flank, and 20 yards in the rear so the main body can't be surprised and wiped out.
13. Every night you'll be told where to meet if surrounded by a superior force.
14. Don't sit down to eat without posting sentries.
15. Don't sleep beyond dawn. Dawn's when the enemy attacks.
16. Don't cross a river by a regular ford.
17. If somebody's trailing you, make a circle, come back onto your own tracks, and ambush the folks that aim to ambush you.
18. Don't stand up when the enemy's coming against you. Kneel down, lie down, hide behind a tree.
19. Let the enemy come till he's almost close enough to touch, then let him have it and jump out and finish him up with your hatchet.
RADZIKOWSKI'S RULES TO WARFIGHTING
1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
2. Decide to be aggressive enough, quickly enough.
3. Have a plan
4. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won't work.
5. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a "4."
6. Be polite, professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
7. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
8. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Bulletproof cover and diagonal or lateral movement are preferred.)
9. Use cover or concealment as much as possible. The visible target should be in FRONT of your gun. But remember, sheetrock walls and the like stop nothing but your pulse when bullets tear through them.
10. Flank your adversary whenever possible. Protect yours.
11. In combat, there are no rules, always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
12. In 10 years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived and who didn’t.
13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating, if you are not communicating, you should be moving. If you aren't doing any of these things, you're a dead man.
14. Bring a gun. Preferably, bring at least two guns. Bring all of your friends who have guns. Bring their friends who have guns.
15. Only hits count. Close doesn’t count. The only thing worse than a miss is a slow miss.
16. If your shooting or shooting stance is good, you’re probably not moving fast enough, nor using cover correctly.
17. If you can choose what to bring to a gunfight, bring a long gun and a friend with a long gun.
18. Accuracy is relative: most combat shooting is more dependent on “pucker factor” than the inherent accuracy of the gun.
19. Use a gun that works EVERY TIME. “All skill is in vain when an Angel pisses in the flintlock of your musket.” At a practice session, throw you gun into the mud, then make sure it still works. You can clean it later.
20. Someday someone may kill you with your own gun, but they should have to beat you to death with it because it is empty.
21. Your first kill will be the hardest. Every other kill after will be a piece of cake.
22. Never drop your guard.
23. Always tactical load and threat scan 360 degrees. Practice reloading one-handed and off-hand shooting. That’s how you live if hit in your “good” side.
24. Watch their hands. Hands kill. Smiles, frowns and other facial expressions don’t. (In God we trust. Everyone else, keep your hands where I can see them).
25. The faster you finish the fight, the less shot you will get. Kill shots, not quick shots.
26. Your number one option for personal security is a lifelong commitment to avoidance, deterrence, and de-escalation.
27. Never ever allow yourself to be taken advantage of, always find your enemy's weakness and exploit it.
28. You can’t miss fast enough to win.
29. Bring four times the ammunition you think you could ever need.
30. If you shoot inside, buckshot is your friend. A new wall is cheap – funerals are expensive
31. No plan ever survives first contact with an enemy.
32. Practice shooting in the dark, with someone shouting at you, when out of breath, etc.
33. Regardless of whether justified or not, you will feel sad about killing another human being. It is better to be sad than to be room temperature.
34. The only thing you EVER say afterwards is, “He said he was going to kill me. I believed him. I’m sorry, but I’m very upset now. I can’t say anything more. Please speak with my attorney.”
Laws of Combat
Murphy's law is an adage or epigram that is typically stated as: "Anything that can go wrong will go wrong".
• Always expect the unexpected
• Always assume that the enemy is the better
• Experienced commanding officers are usually right.
• If you have more than the required amount of warfighters dedicated to a patrol, you will expect little contact If you less than the required amount - you will expect a lot of contact.
• Friendly fire - isn't.
• Recoilless rifles - aren't.
• Suppressive fires - won't.
• You are not Superman; Marines and fighter pilots take note.
• A sucking chest wound is Nature's way of telling you to slow down.
• If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.
• Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo and not want to waste a bullet on you.
• If at first you don't succeed, call in an air strike.
• If you are forward of your position, your artillery will fall short.
• Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.
• Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself.
• Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
• If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.
• The enemy diversion you're ignoring is their main attack.
• The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions: when they're ready. when you're not.
• No OPLAN ever survives initial contact.
• There is no such thing as a perfect plan.
• Five second fuses always burn three seconds.
• There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.
• A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping. Or they're trying to suck you into a serious ambush!
• The important things are always simple; the simple are always hard.
• The easy way is always mined.
• Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy other people to shoot at.
• Don't look conspicuous; it draws fire. For this reason, it is not at all uncommon for aircraft carriers to be known as bomb magnets.
• Never draw fire; it irritates everyone around you.
• If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in the combat zone.
• When you have secured the area, make sure the enemy knows it too.
• Incoming fire has the right of way.
• No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.
• No inspection ready unit has ever passed combat.
• If the enemy is within range, so are you.
• The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
• Things which must be shipped together as a set, aren't.
• Things that must work together, can't be carried to the field that way.
• Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support.
• Radar tends to fail at night and in bad weather, and especially during both.)
• Anything you do can get you killed, including nothing.
• Make it too tough for the enemy to get in, and you won't be able to get out.
• Tracers work both ways.
• If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will get more than your fair share of objectives to take.
• When both sides are convinced they're about to lose, they're both right.
• Professional soldiers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs.
• Military Intelligence is a contradiction.
• Fortify your front; you'll get your rear shot up.
• Weather ain't neutral.
• If you can't remember, the Claymore is pointed toward you.
• Air defense motto: shoot 'em down; sort 'em out on the ground.
• 'Flies high, it dies; low and slow, it'll go.
• The Cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue. Marines do.
• Napalm is an area support weapon.
• Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
• B-52s are the ultimate close support weapon.
• Sniper's motto: reach out and touch someone.
• Killing for peace is like screwing for virginity.
• The one item you need is always in short supply.
• Interchangeable parts aren't.
• It's not the one with your name on it; it's the one addressed "to whom it may concern" you've got to think about.
• When in doubt, empty your magazine.
• The side with the simplest uniforms wins.
• Combat will occur on the ground between two adjoining maps.
• If the Platoon Sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.
• Never stand when you can sit, never sit when you can lie down, never stay awake when you can sleep.
• The most dangerous thing in the world is a Second Lieutenant with a map and a compass.
• Exceptions prove the rule, and destroy the battle plan.
• Everything always fails in your HQ, everything always works in the Colonel's HQ.
• The enemy never watches until you make a mistake.
• One enemy soldier is never enough, but two is entirely too many.
• A clean (and dry) set of BDU's is a magnet for mud and rain.
• The worse the weather, the more you are required to be out in it.
• Whenever you have plenty of ammo, you can't hit the broad side of a barn. Whenever you are low on ammo, you never miss.
• The more a weapon costs, the farther you will have to send it away to be repaired.
• The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.
• Field experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
• No matter which way you have to march, its always uphill.
• If enough data is collected, a board of inquiry can prove anything.
• For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism. (in boot camp)
• Air strikes always overshoot the target, artillery always falls short.
• When reviewing the radio frequencies that you just wrote down, the most important ones are always illegible. • Those who hesitate under fire usually end up KIA or WIA.
• The tough part about being an officer is that the troops don't know what they want, but they know for certain what they don't want.
• To steal information from a person is called plagiarism. To steal information from the enemy is called gathering intelligence.
• The weapon that usually jams when you need it the most is your Squad Automatic Weapon.
• The perfect officer for the job will transfer in the day after that billet is filled by someone else.
• When you have sufficient supplies & ammo, the enemy takes 2 weeks to attack.
• When you are low on supplies & ammo the enemy decides to attack that night.
• The newest and least experienced soldier will usually win the Medal of Honor.
• A Purple Heart just proves that were you smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.
• Murphy was a grunt.
• Beer Math: 2 beers times 37 men equals 49 cases.
• Body count Math: 3 guerrillas plus 1 probable plus 2 pigs equals 37 enemies killed in action.
• The bursting radius of a hand grenade is always one foot greater than your jumping range.
• All-weather close air support doesn't work in bad weather.
• The combat worth of a unit is inversely proportional to the smartness of its outfit and appearance.
• The crucial round is a dud.
• Every command which can be misunderstood, will be.
• There is no such place as a convenient foxhole.
• Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last and don't ever volunteer to do anything.
• If your positions are firmly set and you are prepared to take the enemy assault on, he will bypass you.
• If your ambush is properly set, the enemy won't walk into it.
• If your flank march is going well, the enemy expects you to outflank him.
• Density of fire increases proportionally to the curiousness of the target.
• Odd objects attract fire - never lurk behind one.
• The more stupid the leader is, the more important missions he is ordered to carry out.
• The self-importance of a superior is inversely proportional to his position in the hierarchy (as is his deviousness and mischievousness).
• There is always a way, and it usually doesn't work.
• Success occurs when no one is looking, failure occurs when the General is watching.
• The enemy never monitors your radio frequency until you broadcast on an unsecured channel.
• Whenever you drop your equipment in a fire-fight, your ammo and grenades always fall the farthest away, and your canteen always lands at your feet.
• As soon as you are served hot chow in the field, it rains.
• Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.
• The seriousness of a wound (in a fire-fight) is inversely proportional to the distance to any form of cover.
• Walking point = sniper bait.
• Your bivouac for the night is the spot where you got tired of marching that day.
• If only one solution can be found for a field problem, then it is usually a stupid solution.
• No battle plan ever survives contact with the enemy.
• The most dangerous thing in the combat zone is an officer with a map.
• The problem with taking the easy way out is that the enemy has already mined it.
• The buddy system is essential to your survival; it gives the enemy somebody else to shoot at.
• If your advance is going well, you are walking into an ambush.
• The quartermaster has only two sizes, too large and too small.
• If you really need an officer in a hurry, take a nap.
• The only time suppressive fire works is when it is used on abandoned positions.
• There is nothing more satisfying that having someone take a shot at you, and miss.
• Don't be conspicuous. In the combat zone, it draws fire. Out of the combat zone, it draws sergeants.
• If the Sergeant see you, so can the enemy.
• All or any of the above combined.
• Avoid loud noises, there are few silent killers in a combat zone.
• Never screw over a buddy; you'll never know when he could save your life.
• Never expect any rations; the only rations that will be on time and won't be short is the ration ofshit.
• Respect all religions in a combat zone, take no chances on where you may go if killed.
• A half filled canteens a beacon for a full loaded enemy weapon.
• When in a fire fight, kill as many as you can, the one you miss may not miss tomorrow.
• It is a physical impossibility to carry too much ammo.
• If you survive an ambush, something's wrong.
• Some General last words (as his aides tried to get him to get his head down): "What! what! men, dodging this way for single bullets! What will you do when they open fire along the whole line? I am ashamed of you. They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist..."
The General was General John Sedgwick, said on May 9, 1864 at the Battle of Spotsylvania.
• If you can see the flashes from the enemies' guns in battle, he can see yours too.
• Flashlights, lighters and matches don't just illuminate the surrounding area; they illuminate you too.
• Just because you have nearly impenetrable body armor and a hard-ass Kevlar helmet, doesn't mean you don't have exposed areas.
• There are few times when the enemy can't hear you: When he's dead, you're dead, or both.
• Addendum: When he's not there, when you're not there, or both.
• Never cover a dead body with your own in hopes of looking like you're one of the casualties. Even using his cadaver is a stretch to avoid being shot "just in case."
• You're only better than your enemy if you kill him first.
• Complain about the rations all you want, but just remember; they could very well be your last meal.
• Never underestimate the ability of the brass to foul things up.
• You have two mortal enemies in combat; the opposing side and your own rear services.
• You think the enemy has better artillery support and the enemy thinks yours is better; you're both right.
• Three things you will never see in combat; hot chow, hot showers, and an uninterrupted night's sleep.
• "Live" and "Hero" are mutually exclusive terms.
• Don't be a hero
• Once you are in the fight it is way too late to wonder if this is a good idea.
• NEVER get into a fight without more ammunition that the other guy.
• Cover your Buddy, so he can be around to cover for you.
• Decisions made by someone over your head will seldom be in your best interest.
• Sometimes, being good and lucky still is not enough.
• If the rear echelon troops are really happy, the front line troops probably do not have what they need.
• If you are wearing body armor they will probably miss that part. Happiness is a belt fed weapon.
• Having all your body parts intact and functioning at the end of the day beats the alternative...
• If you are allergic to lead it is best to avoid a war zone.
• Hot garrison chow is better than hot C-rations which, in turn, are better than cold C-rations, which are better than no food at all. All of these, however, are preferable to cold rice balls even if they do have little pieces of fish in them.
• A free fire zone has nothing to do with economics.
• Medals are OK, but having your body and all your friends in one piece at the end of the day is better.
• Being shot hurts.
• Thousands of Veterans earned medals for bravery every day. Only few were even awarded.
• There is only one rule in war: When you win, you get to make up the rules. • C-4 can make a dull day fun.
• There is no such thing as a fair fight -- only ones where you win or lose.
• If you win the battle you are entitled to the spoils. If you lose you don't care.
• Nobody cares what you did yesterday or what you are going to do tomorrow.
• What is important is what you are doing -- NOW -- to solve our problem.
• Always make sure someone has a can opener.
• Prayer may not help . . . but it can't hurt.
• Flying is better than walking. Walking is better than running. Running is better than crawling. All of these, however, are better than extraction by a Med-Evac even if it is, technically, a form of flying.
• If everyone does not come home none of the rest of us can ever fully come home either.
• Carrying any weapon that you weren't issued (e.g, an AK) in combat is Not A Good Idea! A combat vet will know the sound of an unfamiliar weapon in an instant and will point and shoot. Not only that, AKs use green tracers which mean "shoot 'em all and let God sort them out".
• When the going gets tough, the tough go cyclic.
• Military Intelligence is not a contradiction in terms, "Light Infantry" is!
• Proximity factor: The need for relief is directly related to the distance of the relief station.
• Always keep one bullet in the chamber when changing your magazine.
• In peacetime people say, "War is Hell". In combat, under fire from artillery, airplanes, or whatever, a soldier thinks, "War is really really really LOUD as Hell!!!".
• If you can think clearly, know exactly what's happening, and have total control of a situation in combat, then you're not in combat.
• When you get the coveted 1,000 yard stare, don't forget about the enemy who is 30 yards away and about to pop your ass.
• Stay away from officers in combat, they're clever decoys for noncoms.
• If you think you don't need something for your combat load for an OP PLAN, you'll probably wish you had it after the shit hits the fan in combat.
• Hope for the best, prepare for the worst.
• Failure of Plan A will directly affect your ability to carry out Plan B.
• If you drop a soldier in the middle of a desert with a rock, a hammer, and an anvil, tell him not to touch any of it, and come back two hours later, the anvil will be broken. "Because soldiers gotta fuck with shit". (quoted from an Officer during an interview in which the Officer was asked why barrels were thickened on the M-16A2).
• War does not determine who is right, war determines who is left.
• Lackland's Laws Never be first. Never be last. Never volunteer for anything
• An escaping soldier can be used again.
• If you think you'll die, don't worry you won't.
• Near death, but still alive? There is nothing wrong with physics. God doesn't like you.
• It is better to be lucky than good in the battlefield.
• If it's worth fighting for...it's worth fighting dirty for.
• If god wanted boots to be comfortable he would have designed them like running shoes.
• If you survive the extraordinary things, it will often be the little things that will kill you.
• Give an order, then change the order, will get you disorder.
• You never have fire support in heavy firefight but you always have it on a silent recon mission
• Revision to the United States Army Motto "If it makes sense, we won't do it".
• The only thing more dangerous to you than the enemy, is yourself.
• Night vision - isn't
• When you need CAS, they'll be on last weeks radio fill and you won't be able to reach them.
• When you need Apache's, they'll be busy escorting the generals bird around
• Supply & Demand law Whatever you have, you won't need; whatever you need, you won't have.
• Leadership law If it was risky, it worked and no one got hurt: you were brilliant If it was risky, it worked and someone got hurt; you were courageous If it was risky, it didn't work and no one got hurt; you were lucky If it was risky, it didn't work and someone got hurt; you were stupid (and probably dead)
• The best sniper position is always the hardest to reach.
• Snakes aren't neutral.
• When you need to use the bathroom - the enemy is watching your position.
• Never trust a private that says "don't worry I learned this is in basic".
• When the Colonel starts to laugh and says "watch this", LEAVE.
• Bring extra rations when you hear the lieutenant is leading the recce patrol.
• Everything you packed for the field is everything you don't need, and everything you need is at your FOB.
• Be prepared to go defensive when your vehicle breaks down until support arrives.
• Your vehicle is a civilian car painted tan, with less security features.
• Any attempt to find cover will result in failure.
• Supply Shipments at night stick out like a sore thumb.
• Tanks should never leave the established roads.
• Established roads are always mined.
• Operations in daytime will cause the lesser equipped army to win.
• The effectiveness of a soldier in combat is inversely porportional to how heavy his equipment is.
• Have plenty of water on hand.
• Don't pick a fight with the baddest guys on the block!
• If it makes sense, it is not the "Army Way"
• If you do, don't even try to run or hide. The pain will be worse.
• The enemy will always know the area better than you, no matter how many dismounts or convoys you have been on.
• The enemy always have the advantage of blending in with the crowd. You do not.
• The enemy are used to their environment and will rarely, if ever, be out during the hottest or coldest part of the day.
• Drink more water than you think that you will need.
• Always keep your radio fill up to date.
• Don't piss off the local police that run the checkpoints, they may allow insurgents to place IED's near their location just to fuck with you.
• Be nice to the local children, they will soon be either apart of the police, the army or the enemy!
• Always remember: Shoot first and then swear up and down that you saw them pull out a grenade. This works!
• IED's will be placed frequently in the same spots over and over again.
• Always shoot the guy walking down the MSR in the middle of the night carrying a gas can and a shovel. If they can't place the IED's, they can't blow you up!
• Never attribute to an Officer that which is adequately explained by a Private. Never attribute to an Private that which is adequately explained by an Officer.
• If at first you don't succeed, blame it on the new private!
• If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
Laws of War for Aviation • Helicopter tail rotors are naturally drawn toward trees, stumps, rocks, etc.
• While it may be possible to ward off this event some of the time, it cannot, despite the best efforts of the crew, always be prevented.
• It's just what they do.
• The engine RPM and the rotor RPM must BOTH be kept in the GREEN.
• Failure to heed this commandment can adversely affect the morale of the crew.
• The terms Protective Armor and Helicopter are mutually exclusive.
• "Chicken Plates" are not something you order in a restaurant.
• The BSR (Bang Stare Red) Law: The louder the sudden bang in the helicopter, the quicker your eyes will be drawn to the gauges.
• Corollary: The longer you stare at the gauges the less time it takes them to move from green to red.
• Loud, sudden noises in a helicopter WILL get your undivided attention. The further you fly into the mountains, the louder the strange engine noises become.
• It is a bad thing to run out of airspeed, altitude and ideas all at the same time.
• "Pucker Factor" is the formal name of the equation that states the more hairy the situation is, the more of the seat cushion will be sucked up your ass.
It can be expressed in its mathematical formula of: S (suction) + H (height above ground) + I (interest in staying alive) + T (# of tracers coming your way).
Thus the term 'SHIT!' can also be used to denote a situation where a high Pucker Factor is being encountered.
• Running out of pedal, fore or aft cyclic, or collective are all bad ideas. Any combination of these can be deadly.
• Helicopters have been described as nothing more than 50,000 parts flying in close formation. It is the mechanics responsibility to keep that formation as tight as possible.
• It is mathematically impossible for either hummingbirds, or helicopters to fly. Fortunately, neither are aware of this.
• LZ's are always hot.
• There are 'old' pilots and 'bold' pilots, but there are no 'old, bold' pilots.
• Any helicopter pilot story that starts "There I was,...." will be either true or false.
• Any of these stories that end with "No shit." was neither true nor false.
• The mark of a truly superior pilot is the use of his superior judgment to avoid situations requiring the use of his superior skill
• Ch-53's are living proof, that if you strap enough engines to something it will fly.
• The enemy is always has the advantage.
• Heat-seeking missiles don't know the difference between friend and foe.
• 'Armor' is a fantasy invented by your C.O. to make you feel better.
• Afterburners aren't.
• Air Brakes don't.
• Your cannon will jam in combat, and then when you get back to base there will be nothing wrong with it.
• You may have the better aircraft, but the enemy is the better pilot. (or vise versa)
• When getting spare parts for your aircraft, you can get them CHEAP - FAST - IN GOOD CONDITION, pick two. (This applies to everything).
• Your radar will not pick up the enemy behind you or the one in the sun.
• If you have got into the sun and are about to ambush the enemy, it will either be a trap or you'll run out of fuel.
Laws of War for Tanks • The same gun tube that would probably stay in alignment after lifting a car, will get you beaten after calibration if used to assist in climbing on the tank.
• Tanks draw fire. A lot of it. It does not behoove the infantryman to hide behind one.
• If you're close enough to actually hear an M1 series tank running, while in combat, and not part of the crew, you're too close.
Laws of the Marine Corps • It never rains in the Marine Corps, it rains on the Marine Corps.
LAws of Policing
• Your brassard and your badge won't stop bullets.
• If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid.
• Don't look conspicuous - it antagonizes officers.
• When in doubt, empty your shotgun.
• Never share a patrol car with anyone braver than you.
• Not wearing body armor attracts bullets and knives.
• If your response goes well, you're at the wrong barracks.
• Your Patrol Supervisor will show up when you're doing something really stupid.
• The time it takes to respond to an emergency is inversely proportional to the importance of the call.
• The warrant you don't read is the one you'll serve at the wrong quarters.
• No matter how you write it, the Desk Sergeant will want it changed.
• If you charge in all alone, you'll be shot by your own officers.
• The diversion you're ignoring is the actual crime.
• The important things are always simple.
• The simple things are always hard.
• The easy ways are always blocked.
• The short cuts are always under construction by the post engineers.
• Anything you do can get you in trouble - including doing nothing.
• When you've secured a crime scene, don't forget to tell the brass.
• Using the siren and light to clear traffic - attracts traffic.
• It only becomes a riot right after you show up.
• If you take out the newest patrol car, you'll have an accident.
• No street-wise unit ever passed inspection.
• No inspection-ready unit ever makes it on the streets.
• The thing you really need, will be left back at the Station.
• Radios will fail as soon as you need back-up desperately.
• Flashlight batteries always die out, just when you really need light.
• Working dogs attack anything that moves - including you.
• The helicopter will always be low on fuel, as soon as you need it.
• You'll find the suspect you want, when you're off-duty and unarmed.
• If you respond to more than your fair share of calls, you'll have more than your fair share of calls to respond to.
• The suspect will escape, just before you set up a good perimeter.
• The dependent who screams loudly when you don't show up quickly, also screams loudly when you do.
• The weight of the dead body you'll have to carry is proportional to the amount of stairs you'll have to climb.
• Fatalities always occur at the end of shift - or when it rains and snows.
• Your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
• Contrary to popular belief - general officers don't get tickets.
• You won't get called to a court martial - unless it's your day off.
• Take off your hat and the Duty Officer shows up.
• Empty guns - aren't.
• Your two minute "back-up" is always actually ten minutes away.
• The alley you sprint down, is the wrong alley.
• Tasting suspected drugs works - but only on TV or in the movies.
• Suspects always hide in the last place you look.
• Better to be judged by twelve, than carried by six.
• Professional criminals are predictable, but the world is full of amateurs.
• Admit nothing, deny everything, demand proof - then blame a Private.
• Don't stand, if you can sit - don't sit, if you can lay down - if you can lay down, you might as well take a nap.
• Contrary to popular belief, O.C. IS an area effect weapon.
• Bullet Proof vests aren't.
• The bigger they are, the harder they fall. They punch, kick and choke harder too.
• The speed at which you respond to a fight call is inversely proportional to how long you've been a cop.
• Tear gas works on cops too, and regardless of wind direction, will always blow back in your face.
• High speed chases will always proceed from an area of light traffic to an area of extremely heavy traffic.
• If you know someone who tortures animals and wets the bed, he is either a serial killer or he works for Internal Affairs.
• Placing a gun back in a shoulder holster with your finger on the trigger will cause you to walk with a limp.
• Flash suppressors don't really.
• If you have `cleared' all the rooms and met no resistance, you and your entry team have probably kicked in the door of the wrong house.
• If a cop swings a baton in a fight, he will hit other cops more often than he will hit the bad guys he swings at.
• Domestic arguments will always migrate from an area of few available weapons (living room), to an area with many available weapons (kitchen).
• If you have just punched out a handcuffed prisoner for spitting at you, you are about to become a star on Eyewitness News'.
• Bullets work on veteran cops too. They also work on weight lifters, martial arts experts, department marksmen, Narco Investigators, S.W.A.T. jocks, and others who consider themselves immortal.
• When a person sees a red light approaching at a high rate of speed, he will always pull into the lane the cop needs to use.
• If you drive your patrol car to the geometric center of the Gobi Desert, within five minutes some dumbass will pull along side you and ask for directions.
• You can never drive slow enough to please the citizens who don't need a cop, and you can never drive fast enough to please the ones who do.
• Any suspect with a rifle is a better shot than any cop with a pistol.
• From behind you, the bad guys can see your night sights as well as you can.
• On any call, there will always be morebad guys' than there are good guys, and the farther away your back-up, the more there will be.
• The longer you've been a cop, the shorter your flashlight and your temper gets.
• Whatever you are about to do, if there is a good chance it will get you killed, you probably shouldn't do it.
• You should never do a shotgun search of a dark warehouse with a cop whose nickname is "Boomer."
• The better you do your job, the more likely you are to be shot, injured, complained on, sued, investigated, or subpoenaed on your day off.
• If a large group of drunk bikers is "holed-up" in a house, the Department will send one officer in a beat car. If there is one biker "holed-up" in a house, they will send the entire S. W. A. T. Team.
• The likelihood that you are speaking to an undercover law enforcement officer, is directly proportional to the number of personal questions being asked of you.
• Dogs do not see the badge as a person of authority, they see lunch.
• Laser sights work both ways
• Cops arrive late to the scene of crime.
• The number of years on the job is directly proportional to your waist line.
• The number of people who lock their keys in their car is directly proportional to how bad the weather is.
• In general, a persons' innocence is often diametrically opposed to how much they insist that they are.
• Any time you decide to do something, even slightly against the law, a police officer will just so happen to be near enough to see it happen.
• Every thorough investigation leads to confusion
• Your Testimony in Court is unnecessary until both you and your wife coordinate the same time off work together. • Always be sure to give the guy who complains about paying your salary his nickel back before you write his ticket; It will leave him with a better impression of your services.
• The further away the call is into the sticks directly relates to the likelihood you will need a restroom after you are back in service.
• Nobody needs a cop while the cop is around.
• Cops are society's Sacrificial Lambs. Hey, at least we're not their Jackasses. That would be the Brass.
• Even when you're not on call, you're on call. Just ask the Sgt., who doesn't want called.
• On an extended Crime Scene, when someone shows up with the doughnuts and coffee, the cops who usually get them are the ones standing around doing nothing and could have gone themselves.
• If a meter maid tells you that you can park there, then most likely you will get a ticket.
• "Spill-proof" lids containing steaming hot coffee, aren't.
• "Two beers, officer" is always two more than they should have had.
• You're Right, there is no Justice, Just Us.
If, throughout your entire life you have been ruled by Murphy's or Radzikowski's Laws, then at least one thing, usually no more than that, will go so right as to make up for a lifetime of failures.
Rules to EFFICIENCY
The Rules to Efficiency are extensive series of guidelines crafted in order to establish operational efficiency in both a professional and personal environment.
Rule 1: "If you can't stay safe, stay deadly"
Rule 2: "Never let prisoners stay together. Don't take em if you can't hold em."
Rule 3: "Always bring gloves".
Rule 4: "Don't believe what you're told. Double check".
Rule 5: "Never be unreachable"
Rule 6: "The best way to keep a secret? Keep it to yourself. Second best? Tell one other person - if you must. There is no third best."
Rule 7: "Don't waste good."
Rule 8: "Never say you're sorry. It's a sign of weakness."
Rule 9: "Always be specific when you lie. On the other case, don't lie at all."
Rule 10: "Never take anything for granted."
Rule 11: "Never go anywhere without a knife." -
Rule 12: "Never get personally involved."
Rule 13: "When the job is done, walk away." Rule 14: "Never date a co-worker."
Rule 15: "Never, ever involve lawyers."
Rule 16: "Bend the line, don't break it."
Rule 17: "Always work as a team."
Rule 18: "If someone thinks they have the upper hand, break it."
Rule 19: "Never, ever interrupt a conversation or an interrogation."
Rule 20: "It's better to seek forgiveness than ask permission."
Rule 21: "Always look under."
Rule 22: "Never mess with a person's coffee... if you want to live."
Rule 23: "There are two ways to tail someone. First way, they never notice you. Second way, they only notice you."
Rule 24: "When you need help, ask."
Rule 25: "Always watch the watchers."
Rule 26: "If you feel like you are being played, you probably are"
Rule 27: "Your mission, you're lead."
Rule 28: "There is no such thing as coincidence."
Rule 29: "If it seems like someone is out to get you, they are."
Rule 30: "Never accept an apology from someone who just lied to you."
Rule 31: "First things first, hide the women and children." Rule 32: "Clean up the mess that you make."
Rule 33: "Sometimes you're wrong."
Rule 34: "Always give people space when they get off an elevator."
Rule 35: "Never trust a woman who doesn't trust her man."
Rule 36: "Never date a woman that eats more than you do." Rule 37: "Your team should never bypass your chain of command"
Rule 38: "You do what you have to do for family" Rule 39: "Don't work the system when you can work the people"
Rule 40: "Don't stop checking and rechecking evidence until you are satisfied."
Rule 41: "If you want to find something, you follow it."
Rule 42: "Never second guess yourself in a relationship and life."
Rule 42: "Never make excuses."
Rule 43: "Never lie to your buddies."
Rule 44: "Keep digging till you hit bottom."
Rule 45: "Don't sit on the sidelines while your people are in trouble." Rule 46: "Never underestimate your opponent"
Rule 47: "Always keep a spare"
Rule 48: "People can never be too clean."
Rule 49: "It's not about what you know, it's about what you can prove"
Rule 50: "Never hesitate in a fight"
Rule 51: "Always take one for the team"
Rule 52: "Go with your gut, always"
Rule 53: "Never screw over your buddies"
Rule 54: "The greatest challenge in life is finding out who you are, the second greatest is being happy with what you find" Rule 55: "Never turn your back on anybody you don't trust"